I like to go by the name of Vetril, but most people on Earth call me Nisaba or Nabu. I am supposed to keep track of the knowledge that the human specie accesses, so everyone else knows the point you are at. I was not supposed to be a guardian angel, that is not my job. I accept this kind of assignments from century to century, but I should not, I am definitely not good at it.
Even though I knew what was I coming to do, and I had a good time for preparation, everything went wrong from the very beginning. First of all, it was supposed to be a man, or that was what I had jotted down, and believe me, I am strict with my notes. Anyways, here she was. A tiny little baby girl with long tiny arms, screaming like in hell.
She had forgotten every other life, but Jesus, not how to scream and fight. I had it all organized for her to be brought out by the best midwife in the hospital. A doctor good friend of her mother, in fact. But of course, she decided to get out as soon as she woke up, so she born before they changed turns, eager to start her life. She had been waiting a precious time for that moment to arise. I felt sorry for her, she was not supposed to be so tiny.
- I was so cozy in there, what is all of these?! I was expecting a better place, but this is almost unbearable. Please put me back. I love the way I bounced in that warm pool. I loved to feel mami heart beat. I am not ready for this. Please put me back! I cannot believe this people does not understand what I am saying. What a nightmare!
And right about then she started understanding that her life was not going to be easy peasy. No matter how bad she would cry for bringing back the feeling of love and harmony from the world she had left behind.
Her aunt Hope came in with all the information about her cosmological birth chart, but she could not really understand it all, and no one else would be able to assist her on that. Not too many people pursued that kind of knowledge around, as most people were skeptical to believe in messages from the cosmos at that time. Nevertheless, Hope was a natural born mother, she had cared for every child in the family, and likewise she touch her with such a tender love that immediately comfort her.
- My little girl, don't cry no more. You are safe now. Welcome home darling.
I could not see who was touching me, I knew it was not my mother, but her love was so similar that I could never really tell the difference. I suddenly knew I would always be ok.
She slept for a while, and her younger brother came in then. Julius Caesar had been waiting for her sister for a long long time. He was ready to play!! Their mom tried to calm him down but he was on fire. He just wanted to meet her sister and start playing with her right away.
- Where is the flower? Where is the flower?
- Pssss!! Don't scream you will wake her up! She is sleeping now!
- But I want to see her!! Where is she?
- Is in the cote, right behind you.
- Ohh! She is so little!! Can I hold her? Can I change her diapers, mom?
- No, JC - As she used to call him -, you are too little to hold her and she is very fragile right now.
- Mom!! You said I could take care of her!! - He compulsively scratched his head as he used to do when something contradicted his plans.
- Yes, you will be able as soon as she starts walking.
- Oh, ok. And when will she wake up?
She eventually woke up, and her scream started to be famous in the hospital. The nurses were kind of annoyed by her, what was a kind of sign, which would determine something that would keep happening ever since. She had a tremendous ability to shake people, and bring the best and the worst from them. Yeah, I could note that annoying people has been one of her gifts.
Probably the first one being annoyed by her merely existence was her father. He did not mean to cause her any sort of trauma, completely ignoring if his actitud would affect his daughter in any way, if it actually did. But he did not want to have any more children. JC was already out of the plans, and had almost caused a divorce, few years ago. With this one he did not want to pass through the same, so he had chosen a passive aggressive way of dealing with the situation. He would not visit the kid until about a week old. Her two older brothers, 11 and 15 at the time, decided to do the same thing, so she actually settled in the middle of a cold war zone.
But at the womb she had already developed a rare skill, she had learned how to cling to life with all her might. And only I know how many times it has become handy. She was here to stay, and if what others would think of her might hurt, it would ultimately not matter. However, the sorrow of not being welcome also remained within her, as a thick paste of pain covering the walls of the darkest room of her heart.
We angels do not really know how much this kind of things affect humans feelings or their trajectories. It is one of the things we are trying to better understand, but we just have confusing hints. We see how major events make people stronger or barely affected, while the littlest thing can transform a lifetime entirely. The human heart holds many mysteries, and is one of the reasons why they are particularly interesting to analyze as the manifestation of consciousness in the physical plane, and what makes my job so juicy.
Nevertheless he had come up the name this new creature will have. He had selected with the precision of the watchmaker master that he was, skill handed down generation after generation throughout his medieval guild, following his fervent love for the life and passion of Jesus Christ, and his deep trust in the serendipity of life. It seems that a one-of-a-kind woman had left a watch to be repaired at the shop, whose name was Mary of the Cross. Difficult to find another name that best engaged all his projections and mystical intrigues. Thanks God, four-years-old Julius Caesar could not pronounce it, and it quickly was changed to Mac.
Mac seemed to be sleeping placidly and I did my best to rock and lull her. I whispered her how to be calm and happy, and gave her an express pass to dreamland. She could visit it anytime she wanted, and I would be in there in case she needed more defusing whispers. It takes humans so long to remember the qualities of their soul every time, and about an eternity to unveil reality. We had a lot of work ahead, she should rest and grow strong.
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